Are You Willing to Trust God?
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” Romans 15:13
Trust is hard. It requires us to step out of our comfort zones, to relinquish control, to place our confidence in something or Someone other than us.
Remember when our kids were little, and they were determined to do something themselves? They were convinced they knew how, that they were strong enough, that they didn’t need help. But the result was a big mess and frustration and tears because nothing turned out the way they expected or wanted. They didn’t have the foresight, the strength, or the experience to really handle the task.
When it comes to our sons and daughters, we want to know they’re okay. We want to be able to rest, with full assurance that they are making the right choices, befriending the right people, and living in a way that pleases the Lord. Yet they’re out of our homes (most of them, anyway), living on their own and conducting their own affairs with (likely) little thought for us. As a parent, that’s a hard change. We invested so much into them, it’s difficult to let go and not be involved. Oh, we talk, we visit, but we don’t do daily life with them anymore. We’re not sitting down to dinner asking, “How was school today?”. Life with adult children is different. And for parents, it pulls us (sometimes kicking and screaming) into a whole new level of trusting God for their care and protection.
When they were little, we had a false sense of control over their well-being. I think that is God’s grace to young parents. But as our sons and daughters grow and become more independent and begin spending more and more time apart from us, our parental ability to have a hand on everything diminishes…and almost disappears. If we’re honest, we like to be in control, and it is hard to relinquish that role. We like having things go the way we planned or the way we imagine it will work out. But then we get disappointed or upset, annoyed, or pouty when it does not. (our children get it honestly, no?) Sometimes we even push back to others around us… perhaps even to our now adult children, trying to align everything with our ways and wishes once again.
It is then we realize our role as parents is changing, whether we like it or not. If we try to maintain the status quo of their toddler or primary years, we upset the equilibrium of relationships and communication. We can’t keep them little, and we can’t control their choices. We have to let go and trust God.
It's time we ask ourselves some important questions:
Do I love God more than I love (name of son or daughter)
Am I willing to release my grip on (name) in order to allow God to work in their life?
What if God takes (name) to the other side of the world? Will I support and pray for them or will I resist God’s plan and fight for my own will?
What if they experience grief or hardship- will I consume my thoughts with ‘me’ - what could I have done differently to prevent this? Or will I point them to Christ and encourage their faith and trust in His sovereignty?
Am I living out an example of trusting God to my sons and daughters?
It’s tempting to be God’s GPS, telling Him where He’s going and guiding His turns for our lives. We’re quick to yell out “Wrong Turn!” and tell God that’s not where He wants to take us. But what if it is? What if God asks you to give up something you love dearly (a job, a home, a ministry, a relationship) because He is leading you (or your son or daughter) to something else?
Our lives would be fairly dismal if we were left to design our own future because, we can all admit, we are so limited in our humanness. We don’t have the power, the creativity, the sovereignty to design our own destiny, nor to protect and administrate our daily lives. We are fallen, needy children. Yet God loves us so very much He’s planned our life, long before we were ever born. He’s orchestrated all of the locations, experiences, people, and lessons to align with His perfect will. We all could share story after story of things that we would not have chosen for ourselves or our family but that God used to bring growth, blessing, and joy. He is a good Father and He cares for His children.
God asks us to trust Him. That word, trust, is the same as the word believe, ‘pisteuo’ in Greek. It means, “to have faith, to entrust (especially one's spiritual well-being to Christ): believe, commit.” It goes further to mean, “to think to be true; to be persuaded of; to place confidence in.” (1)
So there is one more question that begs to be asked:
Who are you trusting?
Are you trusting in yourself and your ability to orchestrate things? Are you trusting in the strength of your family to ensure your sons and daughters will do what is right? If you are, friend, you are on your way to a difficult and painful awakening. “Everyone who goes on ahead and does not abide in the teaching of Christ, does not have God. Whoever abides in the teaching has both the Father and the Son.” 2 John 1:9 Are you living like you’re abiding or like you don’t have God at all?
God asks us to trust Him because He knows what is best. He knows the beginning from the end and with that in mind, He orchestrates our life with all of its twists and turns, gains and losses, and joys and hardships. He has the end in mind- whereas we only see today.
And if we trust Him, He promises hope, joy and peace. Hope overflowing by the power of the Holy Spirit will only be enjoyed when we abide in Christ. So let’s give up our aspirations of being God’s gps. Let’s let Him be in the driver’s seat while we sit back and trust that He’s more than capable of managing our life and that of our sons and daughters. Trust. It is what God asks us to do daily. Will you trust Him today?
“Father, I confess I struggle with wanting to control things. I let fear and anxiety take over and in my effort to control them, I try and control others. Forgive me, Lord. Speak to my heart tonight. Help me to abide in You. I pray that You would give me a fresh filling of the Holy Spirit so that my thoughts, desires, actions and word reflect Jesus and not my sinful, fallen nature. Lord, I pray that my sons and daughters would see me trusting You so that my life would be an example of peace, joy, and overflowing hope that can only come from You. Lord, work in (name)’s heart and life. Help them to trust You, too. Remind them that You are their good Father and You desire to prosper them, not harm them. Give them strength to trust even when it doesn’t make sense to our limited human understanding. I pray that You would be glorified and Christ be praised, in Jesus’ name, amen.
When we walk with the Lord in the light of His Word
What a glory He sheds on our way!
While we do His good will, He abides with us still
And with all who will trust and obey
Trust and obey, for there's no other way
To be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey (2)
Pray without ceasing.
1. G4100 - pisteuō - Strong's Greek Lexicon (niv). Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org/lexicon/g4100/niv/mgnt/0-1/
2. Sammis, J. H. (n.d.). Hymn: Trust and obey. =. https://hymnary.org/text/when_we_walk_with_the_lord
The Ache of a Momma’s Heart
Recently I came across a verse that hit deeply and made me pause. The words were directed to Mary, the brand new mother of the infant Jesus, from Simeon, a priest in the Temple in Jerusalem, when he met and held the newborn Messiah.
“This child is destined to cause the falling and rising of many in Israel, and to be a sign that will be spoken against, so that the thoughts of many hearts will be revealed. And a sword will pierce your own soul too.” (emphasis added) Luke 2:34-35
Simeon’s words were prophetic and held deep meaning as well as the promise of pain to a mother’s heart. “And a sword will pierce your own soul, too.” Can you imagine hearing that as you hold your week-old baby?
It was a harbinger of what Mary would face as the mother of the Messiah, destined to give His life on the cross, though she likely didn’t comprehend the devastating pain that would come. Jesus would be falsely accused, plotted against, betrayed, beaten, mocked, and then crucified. The many who swore their allegiance would turn away. Those that professed their love for Him would cool and grow indifferent. The sword that ultimately pierced His side would, in effect, pierce the very soul of the mother who loved Him beyond words, not just as her Son, but as her Savior and Lord. Pause for a moment and think about it. She would watch as her Son grew into manhood, into ministry, and into His role as Redeemer - the Lamb slain from the foundation of the world (Rev. 13:8)
Mary didn’t know the resurrection would follow Jesus’ death, though He’d said as much. She only knew that her firstborn, the child of her heart and faith, was experiencing indescribable suffering. Imagine the torment of her heart. Imagine the deep ache and angst she carried as she watched Him endure. Imagine the crushed hopes and dreams. Mary could teach us a bit about being a mother. She endured in spite of the sword that pierced her very soul.
Here’s the thing. Mary knew she was the woman God chose to bring Jesus into this fallen world and that He wasn’t born for her alone. She was cognizant, from the start, that this child was chosen and holy. God had a purpose and plan. Mary might not have understood all that would unfold, but from the start, she believed and trusted God more than the voices and circumstances surrounding her.
It’s a good reminder. God chose us to be the parents of our children, whether by birth, adoption, or children of the heart. He ordained that relationship because it was His will and His plan. Nothing is by chance. Everything has a purpose. We know that with deep love, comes also the need for willingness to sacrifice, endure pain, suffer hardship, but also to delight in joy, and to accept the unexpected- both good and bad. God is Sovereign. Ultimately, as parents, we must also remember and be prepared that, “A sword will pierce your own soul, too.” Because loving another means enduring what may come and releasing our hopes and dreams for what God may design or allow. It can bring an ache that only the Lord can soothe.
The real question is, will we allow our deep ache to define us? Will we allow it to eclipse the Presence and power of the Lord in our own life? Mary didn’t. No, she trusted God fully, even when she didn’t understand. She stepped aside when it was time for Jesus’ ministry to begin. She didn’t demand that He remain at home. She didn’t try to engineer His next steps. She didn’t choose His friendships or His career path. She trusted God to guide His steps. She knew that He knew best and she was willing to trust Him and let Him have His way.
The wedding in Cana saw a shift in the mother-Son relationship. She stepped back and she encouraged others to do whatever Jesus told them to (John 2). We should take lessons from Mary. We need to encourage our children to do whatever Jesus tells them to and go where He leads…whether it keeps them close by or takes them around the world, whether it keeps them surrounded and safe or leaves them vulnerable and at risk in the path of danger. There is no better, or safer, place for our sons and daughters to be than in the will of the Lord, wherever that may be, whether in an office or in the line of duty. If we’re praying for a prodigal, we need to surrender them wholly to God, over and over, assuring our own aching heart that God is capable of saving them from their own rebellion and foolishness and that God must have His way because our way is limited and insufficient.
Godly parenting demands that we lean into and on the Lord, relying on His strength and guidance, otherwise we will crumble under the weight of what it requires from us. Consider this:
Mary trusted God more than she trusted her feelings.
She allowed God’s promises to assure her more than the circumstances surrounding her.
She believed God’s plan, though it may have been obscured, more than what she could see and experience around her.
She chose to find solace and comfort in God, even through the deepest, searing pain she knew as a mother, because she knew God was faithful and she trusted Him.
We don’t hear much about Mary after the crucifixion because, really, the story isn’t about her. She was God’s servant. She allowed herself to be used by God, placed in circumstances and surrounded by people who were all ordained to be part of Jesus’ story. And really, that’s our role in our children’s lives as well. We are here to guide, teach, support, and encourage them to follow Jesus. We are part of His story too, but we may need to step back and allow the Lord to do what He wills rather than engineer our own safe, successful outcome for our sons and daughters. It may not be safe. It may not be sweet. It may ask more of us that we are comfortable or willing to give. But here is the question, are we willing to trust the Lord? Are we willing to endure the sword to our soul in order to raise sons and daughters who give theirs to the Lord?
Let’s pray that the Lord uses that ache to pull us closer to Him, more fervent in prayer and more focused on eternal things.
“Oh, dear Father- the One who loves me more than I know, please soothe my aching heart today. I know that my aching heart is a symptom of my love for (name). But Lord, it can also be a result of a lack of trust. Lord, help me to surrender (name) to You and Your will. Give me confidence in Christ that wherever they go, whatever they do, they are not beyond Your protection and provision (Ps. 139). “Strengthen the feeble hands, steady the knees that give way; say to those with fearful hearts, “Be strong and do not fear; your God will come,” Isa. 35:3-4a. I know You understand the ache of a parent’s heart, dear Lord, because You see your children in their foolishness and rebellion. You see them strut in pride and independence. You long to have a deep, abiding relationship with each of us. You know the ache, Lord. I pray that You would daily remind me when I feel the throb of Momma’s heart, that it be a reminder to get on my knees and talk with You. Lord, let it drive me to depend on You, lean into You, and trust You for (name)’s every moment, their protection and provision. Lord, help me to trust You more than my feelings that will lie, deceive, and distract me. Help me to cling to Your promises, not the hint of a changing tide or a glimmer of hope. Help me to trust Your plan and not engineer my own. Lord, help me to rest under the shadow of Your wings and find my safety in Your strong tower. You are The Almighty. You can do anything. I believe, Lord, help my unbelief. I lift (name) to You today and trust that You will work and accomplish Your will in their life for their good and for Your glory, in Jesus’ name, amen.”
Pray without ceasing
A Prayer for the Church: Let the Peace of Christ Rule
Colossians 3:15 “And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.”
As we anticipate the remembrance of Christ’s death and resurrection, it’s a time many often give something up to remind them of all Christ gave on our behalf. But instead of ‘going without’ why don’t we commit to praying for the Body of Believers, we who daily represent Christ to this world, those with whom we are joined as The Church and The Bride. We should pray, too, for our sons and daughters as they are members of the Body (or if they are not, they would be drawn to know Christ).
Dark days are ahead…in fact they are here and walking faithfully requires us to be intentional. Let’s immerse ourselves in Scripture that reminds us of who we are in Christ and how we are called to live as His church.
Let's commit to pray in the weeks building to Resurrection Day that God would move and work in His Church so that we would stand strong against the enemy and would uphold one another to remain faithful. Will you commit to pray too?
Colossians 3:15 “And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.”
The phrase "Let rule" is the word “brabeuo” in Greek and it means to arbitrate or umpire, to govern.
A question for prayer and meditation:
What are we allowing to rule in our hearts and govern our thoughts and responses?
Our Prayer point:
Pray that the Church would allow the peace of Christ to rule in our hearts individually and collectively and pray the world would see this extraordinary peace and be drawn to Christ.
Pray without ceasing
The Value of Influence (or, why parenting is never really finished)
We would all probably agree that when we were young we didn’t have perspective. The world was wide open in front of us and we had so much life to live! There was so much we had yet to experience that we were not necessarily eager for Jesus’ coming. Though we loved the Lord, we didn’t want to miss out. We would say things like “I want to get married first.” “I want to have children” I want to… the list was endless. There was much here that held our attention and charmed us. We didn’t fully comprehend the amazing promise of the hope of heaven and, though we looked forward to it ‘someday’, it wasn’t something we thought we were ready for…just yet.
But as we get older, we begin to realize just how flawed this world is. We see the brightness become tarnished. Perhaps we experienced the loss of a loved one or a tragedy close to home and it begins to bring eternity into focus. Our hearts begin to long for heaven because we know that’s where everything is made whole. Our ever-increasing awareness of the brokenness here makes us long for the place and the Person who will bring healing and wholeness. We grow to realize this temporary shadow of a world and of a life are not what we are made for and there is so much more. We begin to await the promise with an eager expectation.
Our sons and daughters are reaching that age and stage when they are, perhaps, not as forward-looking as they should be… or, rather, upward looking. They lack perspective because they lack years and experience.
Our task as parents is not to just ‘raise them right and hope for the best’. We are not done parenting when our sons and daughters step out on their own. Our parenting changes, yes, but it doesn’t stop. We should be just as committed to impressing the Truth on them as we were when they were little, but our tactics need to be appropriate to the age and the now adult-to-adult relationship that our grown sons and daughters need and deserve.
Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is. Ephesians 5:15-17
Titus 2 gives us a great explanation of what God tasks us with as we mature and become the ‘older men’ and ‘older women’. It explains the responsibility we have to build up the next generation of believers. The chapter calls us to teach the younger men and women how to live godly lives- but to do that, we need to be always learning too! There is so much at stake. If we are Christ-followers, our lives should reflect that at every opportunity and it should not stop for our sons and daughters simply because they’ve created their own home and family. Our influence as parents does not and should not stop.
Titus 2:1-3, 11-14
1 You, however, must teach what is appropriate to sound doctrine.
2 Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance.
3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good….
11 For the grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people.
12 It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age,
13 while we wait for the blessed hope—the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ,
14 who gave himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are his very own, eager to do what is good.
So, what should this look like? First, everything we teach, what we say and do, must stem from and be connected to sound doctrine. And what is that? It’s teaching that is without error. That takes us right back to scripture. We, as the older men and women, need to study, to learn, to allow the Holy Spirit to work in us and give us discernment and discretion. It is an intentional pursuit of God’s Truth. We cannot influence others rightly if we’re not pursuing righteousness ourselves.
We must also be cautious as we sit under the teaching of others. It’s not about the position, status, and power of the individual who is teaching- if that’s becomes the method by which we evaluate truth, that can lead to error because we become enamored, following the person but neglecting to weigh and evaluate the accuracy of their teaching against the standard of Scripture. When we make assumptions about accuracy because of someone’s popularity, reputation and/or position, we become foolish, not wise. It’s okay to question what you hear and compare it to what Scripture says. Paul praised the Bereans for doing just that! (Acts 17:11)
Following the pursuit of sound in doctrine (an ever-continuing process of learning), Paul calls us, as the older adults, to some very specific tasks and responsibilities. Gentlemen, you are called to be temperate (sober), worthy of respect (have an honorable character), self-controlled and sound (uncorrupt and wholesome) in faith, love and endurance. That’s a big task with qualities that do not come naturally. They require maturity in faith and depth of knowledge of the Truth and an active, intentional pursuit of Christ and submission to the Holy Spirit. It requires honest introspection with the Word of God as your standard of comparison. It requires humility and authenticity.
Ladies, we also are called to some hefty challenges. We are to be reverent (actions and words that reflect God) in the way we live (our behavior and attitudes), we are not to be a slanderer or a gossip (watch your tongue…and watch how you share ‘prayer requests’), we are not be enslaved to things that would control us (Paul mentions wine, but insert whatever it is that would command our life, our love and attention, our choices other than God…ie: an idol) and we are to teach what is good (or, be a teacher of goodness).
We are called to teach, but here’s the thing. We can become really good at telling others how they should live. But if we’re not first inspecting and correcting our own lives, how can we then have the credibility to teach others to do so? If we’re not living it ourselves, our words lack integrity and any authority we might try to wield really has no power or influence. We’re ‘full of air’ and our words lack substance. We need to go back to that first instruction- know sound doctrine.
None of this is generated or sustained by our own ability or godliness. It’s generated and sustained by God’s presence and power in our lives.
2 Peter 1:3 His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.
HIS divine power. Not our own. We are set apart and called. We are tasked with teaching those who are younger than we, whether they are our own sons and daughters or those related to us because of the family of God.
Let’s not lose focus, friends. Let’s not neglect our calling. Parenting doesn’t end because the kids grow up. Parenting should not stop because they’ve ‘aged out’ of childhood into adulthood. Parenting is taking every opportunity to share wisdom, to encourage and challenge, and to build up the faith of our sons and daughters, and those younger people God puts in our lives, in ways that are beneficial to them and to others. It is embracing our role as the ‘older’ to teach, encourage and guide the ‘younger’ to walk faithfully with Christ. Whether you have children or not, you are part of the family of God and there are those in the family who need the godly influence of an older, more seasoned believer. One who is still eager to learn more about God and increase their faith and their faithfulness until the day they stand before Him in glory. We need to live out the example until we become a part of that ‘cloud of witnesses’.
Ephesians 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
Today, let’s pray for one another that we would have a hunger and thirst for righteousness. Pray that we would continue to learn sound doctrine so that we can teach and encourage correctly. Pray that we would be fully dependent on the grace of God to empower and guide our learning, our words, our actions and our lives so that our testimony would impact and encourage those around us who are younger and who need godly examples that model how to wait well for the blessed hope.
Titus 2: 11-13 “For the grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people. It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age, while we wait for the blessed hope—the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ,”
“Father, You have called us to be examples in how we live and influence others because, whether or not we intend to be, we are an influence. Help us to recognize that our words and actions make an impact and help us to speak and act wisely. Help us, as parents, to find effective ways to continue impressing Your Truth on our sons and daughters, ways that respect their adulthood but that allow them to understand they still have much to learn. Remind us that we are still learning, too. And if we don’t think we are or should be, teach us Lord to look and listen for You and to understand that until we stand before You, there will always be much to learn. Mold us into Titus 2 men and women who speak into the next generation with Godly wisdom and who act in ways that show others that Jesus lives in us. Help us to wait for that blessed hope- Your glorious appearing and I pray that we would not be ashamed at Your coming, but would rejoice that our faith becomes sight! Oh, Lord, move and work in this next generation. Raise them up to be mighty men and women of faith who speak boldly for Jesus. Give them a passion for You and compassion for those who don’t yet know You. I pray these things in Jesus’ name, Amen.”
Pray without ceasing