Forgive, and then, Forgive More
“And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.”
Matthew 6:12
Debts: opheilema (Greek) that which is owed; an offense or sin. (1)
Consider this: withholding love and forgiveness from someone because of hurt they've caused us may seem justified...we want them to acknowledge just how much they hurt us. We want them to earn our forgiveness. Oh, we 'plan to offer forgiveness' once they've proven themselves sorry enough and we consider that being the 'bigger person'. We rationalize our stance based upon our rightness (and our level of hurt) and upon calling the other 'up' to what is right.
But that isn't what Christ calls us to do. He tells us to forgive, and forgive more. If He withheld His love from us until we were sorry enough and worthy enough, we'd never know His forgiveness. We are not deserving of His redemption. He saved us because He loves us. Do we love enough to forgive?
Pray about having a forgiving heart and then, forgive. Forgive again. And keep on forgiving, because it’s what God does for us. You see, forgiveness isn’t about being right. It’s not about holding others accountable. It’s about freeing our own heart to be right with God and to hear His voice because we’ve quieted our own by His truth.
“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” Colossians 3:12-13
“Oh, Heavenly Father, You love us so deeply and far too often, we don’t comprehend the depth of Your love, nor the cost of forgiveness that You extend to us so freely. The depth of the dirtiness and depravity of our own sin is often lost on us. We see ourselves as ‘not THAT bad’, yet all of our perceived righteousness is as filthy rags, impure, soiled, and good for nothing. It can’t purchase our forgiveness- we don’t deserve it. We are hell-bound yet righteous in our own eyes.”
“Lord Jesus, give us a true picture of our sin and lostness. Help us to see that we are so undeserving and, in seeing how lost we are, help us to see how Your redemption is perfect, eternal, unchanging, abundant and FREE. We don’t deserve it, yet You extend it. We can’t earn it, yet You give it to us freely. Help us to see just how much You’ve given and how greatly You forgive, and then prick our hearts with compassion. Convict us to want to forgive others quickly and completely. Remind us that forgiveness is not a ‘feeling’ but a choice, an action, and a willingness to allow You to be the judge and hold the ‘other’ accountable. Remind us that if we want to be like You, Jesus, we will forgive even those who don’t understand how they’ve hurt us.”
“Jesus said, ‘Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.’” Luke 23:34
“Holy Spirit, fill us with more of You so that we willingly forgive others. Free us from the bondage of unforgiveness that poisons us and makes it difficult to hear Your voice and obey Your will. Give us strength and conviction to extend forgiveness to others, not with a “yes, but..” rather, with an “I already have, I love you.” Help us to forgive others, just as you forgave us, in Jesus’ name, amen.”
Pray without ceasing. Forgive without stopping. Love others generously. Be like Jesus.
G3783 - opheilēma - Strong's Greek Lexicon (nasb95). Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org/lexicon/g3783/nasb95/mgnt/0-1/
Acid Tongue
Ephesians 4:29 “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”
Acid burns. It corrodes. It’s sour. Those qualities can describe our words, too. They hit hard, they burn and fester. Words can eat away at our heart and mind leaving them raw, exposed and hurting. Words can set our spirit on edge and cause damage that is not easily repaired.
Sometimes we may find ourselves using our words to try and motivate certain responses or actions - what we think our sons and daughters should do or be. But that can quickly turn into using words as a weapon to accomplish our own agenda. Our words can become passive-aggressive and just plain nasty. Maybe we don’t intend them to be so; sometimes we don’t realize the weight and sharpness of our words. But we should.
James 3:5-10 says, “Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and sea creatures are being tamed and have been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be.”
Our words can pull others close, or push them away. They can speak truth in love and be a balm to a hurting heart. Or our words can be caustic, burning as they hit and leaving scars as they sink deeply. Our mantra should not be “well, the truth hurts”. It should be “how can I speak like Jesus?” You see, Jesus didn’t look for opportunities to tear others down, to speak ‘truth that hurts’ or to use passive-aggressive means to win souls. He didn’t use His words to puff himself up or show himself ‘better than’. He didn’t use words to shame or humiliate. No, Jesus was compassionate. He was thoughtful.
Yes, Jesus spoke truth- He IS the Truth. But he spoke it in such a way that the ‘other’ was respected. He spoke with words that intrigued the listener and supported the Holy Spirit’s work in them. Even those caught in sin were spoken to in love, not spite or arrogance (that was the Pharisees’ approach). The woman in John 8, caught in sin, wasn’t given a whole sermon on her depravity. She wasn’t paraded out as an example to others and shamed for her actions. Her missteps were not listed out for her and all others to hear. She wasn’t humiliated because of her error, she was shown compassion, because Jesus loved her and He wanted His words to reflect His love and compassion.
Proverbs 12:18 “There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”
Let’s not allow our words to be dictated by which day of the week it is….- speaking sweetly on Sunday when we’re at church and then turning the switch to acid words when we get in the car and set our Bible aside. Let’s stop and think, “will my response, my words, my questions and my encouragements make others love Jesus more…or will they begin to corrode the heart and spirit of the listener?”
The Lord calls us to love Him with all of our heart, our soul, our mind and our strength (Luke 10:27). If all of us is consumed with Him, then our words will be a by-product of that relationship. We’ll speak words of truth and life because that’s where our heart, soul, mind and strength are grounded . If our words don’t reflect that, it’s an indication that our focus might need some readjusting.
Friends, Jesus doesn’t need us to be another's ‘Holy Spirit’. He’s got that covered. He needs us to speak truth in love. Yes, friends, it’s time to watch our words. Let’s put aside the acid tongue and speak to one another, to our sons and daughters, to those who may be within earshot, with an agape vocabulary: one that shows affection, goodwill, benevolence and love. “Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.” Proverbs 16:24.
Today, let’s pray that we speak in ways that reflect Christ. Pray that our sons and daughters would as well. Pray that the Holy Spirit would put a guard on our tongues and prick our hearts when we begin to pour acid instead of honey. Let’s impact our world with the Love of Christ, not the sting and stench of the old nature.
“Father, You are the Author of Truth and the giver of good. If we are your children, we should reflect Your nature- help us to do that. I pray that when I speak, it would be motivated by love and not my own agenda. Lord, I so want my sons and daughters to follow after You. But sometimes my words don’t encourage them and the example I set is not always one that reflect You. Change me, Lord. Make me more like Jesus. Let the words I speak build others up- even if they’re just overhearing, let them be blessed because they hear Jesus in the way and words that I speak. I pray for (name) today. Let the words of their mouth and the meditation of their heart be pleasing in Your sight, Lord (Ps. 19:14) Lord, help us to respond, not react, when we choose to speak. Let our words be like honey, not like acid. Lord, I love You and I want to represent You well. Please work in me, work in my family, let our words point others to the cross, not to a wake of wreckage that we leave behind due to our acid tongues. Let us be known for the sweetness of our words, not an acid tongue. “Set a guard, O LORD, over my mouth: keep watch over the door of my lips.” (Ps 141:3” In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.”
Pray without ceasing, friends!
G26 - agapē - Strong's Greek Lexicon (kjv). Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org/lexicon/g26/kjv/tr/0-1/
